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Joe's Diary

The latest news from the whispering grass!

The 4 Ugly Faces Of Winter Kill (And How To Defend Your Lawn)

In case you live under an awesomely insulated rock void of wiffy, 4G and all other communication methods, it’s gotten pretty nippy blisteringly freezing outside. As in I got blisters on my hands. From the cold. Which was brutal. There’s actually a picture of them on Instagram. It’s the square with the hot pink hands [read more]

10 Grass Facts That Will Make Your Mind Melt Out Of Your Ears

I’m gonna hop on the good foot, do the bad thing and get straight to it: your lawn is the bombdiggity. It’s amazing. It’s like the first pancake you get right on Shrove Tuesday. It’s like throwing a ball against a wall and finally reaching your target of a hundred. It’s like… oh you get [read more]

A Lawn-Based Resolution That Will Marginally Improve Your Life

This may sound a tiny bit sad, but I’m a massive fan of January. And, no, it’s not because I’m one of those people that likes to do a million Insta-stories revolving around the whole “New Year, New Me” cliche. For the record, I liked last year… a lot…  and I was pretty fond of [read more]

Lawn Care Fact No.7: Nitrogen & Grass Are BFFs

Do you know what’s groovy? I mean apart from James Brown. Okay and Jamiroquai. And maybe Rick James. Oh, forget it. Nitrogen. That’s what’s groovy. Not as in the band (if there is a band with that moniker), as in the chemical you plonk into the soil, and that’s because soil-based nitrogen is the most [read more]

Why You Need To Say Sorry To Mr Dandelion (And Then Do These Instead)

If there’s one thing nature loves doing more than anything else, it’s changing. It bloody loves a bit of change. You’ve got those humble caterpillars that love transforming into a beautiful butterflies, teeny-tiny acorns that love turning into wise old oak trees, the English weather, which blows hot and cold more often than a toddler [read more]


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